Fall

I’m finishing my appointment, saying goodbye and step into the fall city. A ten minutes walk home is lying ahead. It had rained a bit. A world full of drops and glance. Leaves are sailing through the air. I feel my camera in my bag. My speed is slowing down. Something colorful is stopping me, oil on leaves, all colors between a parking car and the sidewalk. I take my time: seeing, understanding, expressing. Right in the middle of it, I hear a voice commenting what I am doing. „Shame on them. For sure the person, who is  responsible will not be caught.“ I guess which kind of communication could happen now and as my answer I show my camerascreen towards the speaker. He comes close, looking carefully and then he turned away (around) speechless and obviously surprised by my image.

I’m continueing on, strolling through the streets, I’m drifting from perception to peception. For a while I’m absorbed by looking down, the I’m surprised by the color of a facade, of a tree and a scaffolder. Drops on colorfol leaves on shiny varnish. What a beauty these fallcolors are unfolding, when I’m able to be slow. Just some days ago I saw images from other people, who were showing the first autumn leaves and I thought: „Ok. Now this Miksang-season is beginning. Leaves everywhere in the online-gallerys.“ A slightly delimitation was swinging in my thoughts. I will look out for something different, don’t want to make the same images.  Today I’m smiling at myself and I think how absurd this idea is to separate me from my own experience, just to be different.  The wish to be unusual, special and unique in your everyday experience could be a really strong concept. So the only discrimination which is guiding me is to experience my perceptions in a really fresh way. Even if a leaf on a car is reminding me on an image Michael Wood was showing yesterday, so it can be me, who is being stopped by this perception, who is understanding and expressing it.  If I catch myself trying to make a similar excellent image like my teacher, so I’m on a slippery slope. My ambition is infiltrated. I’m no longer joyful in the moment, but rather on my way to the third and fourth thought, which is overlaying what I’m experiencing.  My only truly ambition in Miksang is to open up for my perception and to express this as perfect as possible. So I plunge into the colorfulness of this fall.

On the next day I am again on my way to an appointment, I’m looking at the colors of the landscape during my cardrive. I do see three- and more colorful trees, I can read their sunside. I stop to make a little walk, want to be slower and more close to nature. The color of a very red tree is stopping me. It is shining through the other trees. I try to find my way to it, get frustrated through fences and feel that it is getting complicated. My thoughts are busy to think about how excactly I can capture this redness…  In the middle of that I stop, inhale and exhale: I was stopped by the shinyness of the red through the green. I relax, come back to my perception, discerning where it begins and where it ends and klick – press the button. Miksang is simple.

Yesterday a first feeling of sadness appeared. Soon the beauty of fall will end. But I know for sure, I will lean into the new, which will be coming

Click and see the Fall-Album